Best Prostate Massage Sex Toys For Men | UK 2022

2022-10-09 13:50:25 By : Mr. Zhike Wang

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No ifs, no butts, we test the best sex toys to stimulate your P-spot

You ought to know by now that cis-gender men (and trans women) have a “G-spot” nestled discreetly where the sun don’t shine. Whether or not you are already into butt stuff, you’ll no doubt have heard that this fabled booty button is capable of unlocking profound, orgasmic pleasure.

Straight or gay, top or bottom, if you generally try to get the most out of your spare time, your diet, your workouts or your toothpaste tube, doesn’t it track that you’d want to up your orgasm game too?

To help you get there, we have set ourselves the task of selflessly reviewing the best prostate sex toys on the market. Read on for our red-hot dispatches from the cutting-edge vanguard of ass play, including basic tips on how to have good, clean fun, plus the best prostate massagers to buy now.

In a hurry? Here are the bestsellers. Keep scrolling for the full list.

• Best premium prostate massager - Lelo Billy 2, £129.00 • Best prostate vibe with curved shaft - Rechargeable P-Spot Probe, £49.99 • Best prostate massage toy for beginners - Deep Sweep P-Spot Massager, £34.99 • Best remote control prostate massager - We-Vibe Vector, £119.00 • Best battery powered prostate sex toy - Rebel Prostate Massager, £20.99

If for any reason you’re a bit squeamish about anal play, you might have bigger and more serious problems than I can deal with here. Real men love things up their ass. Period. And whether you’re a novice or a bold adventurer, there are plenty of toys on the market to help you explore the concept.

So, what are the benefits of butt fun? Stimulating the prostate during sex, masturbation or anal play augments orgasm, making you cum harder and longer or even pushing you to a dry orgasm. Yep, that’s a thing.

If you’re new to anal pleasure and you don’t see why this matters, imagine a woman having sex but not involving her clitoris, or a man only using half his wang. By not exploring your P-spot, you’re only getting half the story. Step in prostate massagers...

The kind of knee-shaking pleasure we get from prostate stimulation is not a closely-guarded secret. Sex toy brands offer a plethora of objets d’art promising myriad joys, and there’s something for everyone, from the curious beginner to the seasoned size-queen.

The most common prostate toys are butt plugs and massagers, usually with motors for vibration and (thankfully) often with a remote control for those of us whose arms aren’t four feet long with multiple double-jointed elbows and eyes on our knuckles.

Use your prostate massager by yourself while you’re having a wank, slide one into a friend or loved one, or let them take you to tremble town while your schlong, mouth or hands are otherwise engaged. There are no wrong answers and anal play is only going to make things hotter. Honest.

Below, we have included toys ranging from pint-sized pocket rockets to high-end power tools, with prices to match, and honest reviews from a team of enthusiastic helpers.

Brand new to butt stuff? Consider the following tips before you get stuck in:

There’s an ancient saying that still holds true to this day: Shit happens. But let’s be honest, if you’re heading for the pleasure dome it’s nice if it, well, doesn’t. Arseholes are like opinions. Everybody has one, and some are more palatable than others. Every one is magical in its own way, and each of us has to explore what works for us when preparing for anal play.

Some people are naturally blessed, others may have a routine for preparing. This can mean taking fibre supplements, eating more healthily, trying out silicone suppositories (available from any chemist) or simply familiarising yourself with basic douching. If you’ve never douched, be gentle and start small. You’ll be surprised how good it is to feel clean, and it’ll help you relax when you’re experimenting with anal play alone or with a partner.

Our journey begins in what Julian Clary brilliantly titled his hilarious autobiography, A Young Man’s Passage. Specifically, about five centimetres in. When you’re feeling good and frisky, slide in a clean finger (yours or somebody else’s) or toy, slathered in plenty of lube, pointing it towards your belly button, and you should strike gold.

Go easy here, your body is a temple and the anus is the shrine, so don’t go all bull in a china shop… yet. Start slowly and gently and build up the pressure. You need to find a rhythm that’s right for you. Once you’re feeling horny, this will up the ante, and you’ll soon find yourself at the end of the rainbow.

Experimenting with anal play is the beginning of a long and beautiful friendship. The tissue inside your butt is more sensitive than most, and unlike the vagina, the anus is not self-lubricating. Short nails, clean hands and plenty – seriously guys, plenty – of lube are your butt-fun basics.

Frankie says relax, and he is right. Lie back and for god sake don’t think of England in its current state. Think relaxing thoughts and get ready to blow like a volcano.

With a little help from a talented team of experts, we've personally tested the best prostate massagers on the market. Keep scrolling to see how they measure up...

An exceptionally simple, sleek example of a prostate toy, the P-Spot Probe is fairly large, but if it’s not your first time at the rodeo, it’s optimal. Curved in just the right way, the handle is really easy to hold, but let’s be honest, this is clearly intended to be held by someone else. In fact, this comes into its own when someone’s face is at about hip height, and they’re reaching round to use it on you, while they get their job done. Subtle enough?

Used with a partner, it’s ergonomic and doesn’t have the potential ungainly quality that L-shaped massagers can have. It has seven vibration modes you can cycle through as you play, and it’s totally waterproof for shower and bath time entertainment.

This is a great toy for anyone tentatively exploring their arsehole. Sleek and smooth with a good silicone texture that doesn’t feel too artificial, it has 10 rumbling settings you can try out using the handy remote control.

I’m not sure about a deep sweep, but handled and angled right this is the perfect toy to use while you're having a wank. The motor’s powerful enough and it’s slim, discreet and sized to fit even an inexperienced bumhole, as it’s slimmer but slightly longer than some prostate massaging toys.

In terms of bang for your buck, the Deep Sweep punches well above its price tag, and if you’re not used to regular rides on the tunnel of love, I’d say this is a very good place to start.

For the connoisseur with a little more money to spend, Lelo are your go-to brand. They do a good line in chic, sophisticated-looking toys that arrive in expensive-feeling, low-key packaging that makes you feel like James Bond’s pulling up in an Aston Martin to get you off.

The Billy 2 is the kind of size that might give a man a certain swagger, and the super-simple, four-button control makes it intuitive to use in a way that more sex toys should be. The vertical handle design, like the Mantric Probe, lends itself to use with a partner or partners. Hell, make a party of it.

But reader, it’s the motor. I don’t know what Lelo put in their toys, and no doubt it’s what makes them a little pricier than others, but the power is real. This is, frankly, the kind of sex toy you would take to The Ivy as a reward for performance.

Amid growing concerns about the economy, the We-Vibe Vector swings into your life promising a strong and stable pound. On first glance, it looks like your standard prostate massager – sleek silicone for a natural feel, L-shaped to stimulate your prostate and your perineum with fairly powerful dual motors at either end – but it has two features that set it apart from its peers and, if you ask me, justify the slightly higher price.

Firstly, it’s quiet. In a field of buzzing, rumbling toys, whisper-quiet discretion feels like a very exciting innovation. Secondly, as well as a remote, it can be controlled through an app. If, say, you wanted someone to control your orgasm and edge you from a distance, this feature might be for you. I was going to say that a little bit of dom/sub play never hurt anyone, but who am I kidding? What I will say is, if you are into it, be a good boy and you will be rewarded.

As the energy crisis rolls on, my series of sex tech reviews have seen the kind of charging action (and cable chaos) that are sure to make my eyes water at the end of the month. And not in the good way. Of the toys that are battery operated (last longer, don’t run out when you’re only halfway up the stairway to heaven), the Rebel came out on top.

While this prostate massager doesn’t come with a remote, it does have seven pretty good vibration settings that range from mild to wild, so you can ramp things up as you amp things up.

So, I may have balked at being sent a toy for ladies (the cheek! The nerve! The audacity and the gumption!) however... The Smart Wand from Lelo is designed for the fairer sex, but look, to a lot of people, so is the penis. And some of us have found a handy workaround for that, haven’t we? For as long as there have been butts, people have put things in them. From root vegetables to (allegedly) hamsters, life finds a way.

When a female friend told me that the Smart Wand was so powerful she could easily get herself off through her clothes, I decided I had to give it a go. For anal play, I recommend clothes off. In fact, if you’re spending the evening with a friend and the Smart Wand, take the next day off. You can thank us later.

It’s hard to imagine being in the midst of some sweaty, heady action and grunting to your partner, “babe, get the Bondara Gyrate 10 Function Remote Rotating Prostate Massager out”. But once you’ve tried it, it’s very easy to imagine demanding “the rotating one” as you’re shuddering your way through a bumper sesh.

Rotating and rumbling its way through 12 vibration settings, the Gyrate proved perfect for trying out different pressure points and being able to get the grinding exactly how and where you want it.

Special mention to the G-Play for being openly bisexual. One of the few toys we tested on a straight couple, it got banging reviews from both participants, which, I believe, is a step towards true and meaningful gender parity.

It comes in different sizes, but honestly the large is – let’s be honest – not that large. Size isn’t everything, and “go big or go home” is not a phrase that’s always applicable to experimenting with anal play, but also, like, in for penny, in for a pounding, am I right?